


The only person who matters

by cutebutpsyco



Category: Doctor Strange (movie), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Originally Posted on Tumblr, post avengers: endgame, survivior guilt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-23
Updated: 2019-05-23
Packaged: 2020-03-13 06:38:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18935452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cutebutpsyco/pseuds/cutebutpsyco
Summary: “You shouldn’t be there,” Tony said, his voice was hush while he was giving his backs to Stephen.





	The only person who matters

**Author's Note:**

> This is a fic I wrote to thank Tumblr user artepotter for their ko-fi, it’s angsty, and I’m not even sorry.
> 
> As always, unbetad and nothing belongs to me.

“You shouldn’t be there,” Tony said, his voice was hush while he was giving his backs to Stephen. He was looking outside the glass wall of the Avengers Tower. It was clear that his eyes were focused on something in the landscape of New York, but Stephen couldn’t tell what it was because everything was too dark and nothing but the spot from the streetlights seemed to flash in the night of the city that never sleeps. 

Maybe the city didn’t, but only the lonely souls were wide awake in the middle of the night. Stephen wasn’t surprised that Tony was one of those. He wasn’t even surprised that the man didn’t want the Sorcerer to be there, but the truth was that Strange couldn’t go back to the Sanctum and with Christine, at the Hospital he didn’t have any other place where to go. He nodded, knowing that the other man couldn’t see him, though he stepped closer.

“I’m sorry,” He said, instead, once he reached the glass, leaning against it as if he was trying to look at Stark’s eyes. He really wished to be able to lose himself in those as he did a lot of times in the possible futures he saw on Titan, but those had been a pleasant fairytale and Stephen wasn’t the kind of man to believe in those, or in faith and love. 

“Don’t be,” Tony whispered, and still he didn’t turn to look at Stephen and the Sorcerer knew that it was because he could barely bear the idea of being in the same room where he was. He moved on the side, distancing himself from Strange just to lean closed a moment later. It was like it was some sort of dance, steps that required them to move continuously closer and closer only to go back far from each other when they could have touched. And still, neither of them was able to step too far from the other. “But I meant that for real. You should leave, now.”

“I come here because I wanted to speak with you,” Stephen answered, not daring, this time, to search for Tony’s eyes with his. He couldn’t, he wasn’t brave enough to look at the face of the man that gave up on everything for the slightest hope that Strange knew what that would have led. Except that he didn’t, not for real. And that was his fault. “I… I need to speak with you, Tony.”

“No,” The billionaire’s voice, this time, was higher, it wasn’t a whisper any longer and it took some instants to Stephen to register that variation and step back just what was necessary for the man to move away from the window. His steel blue eyes were still cast on his feet as if Stark’s glance could burn it. Maybe it was what would have happened if he dared to look at those beautiful whiskey brown eyes. “You need to go back to the Sanctum. It is your place. You can’t come here.”

And Stephen knew that he knew that he couldn’t, and yet, every night, he just went to the Tower. There was a reason why Stark still admitted him to the penthouse, even if Strange didn’t know that reason yet. Maybe it was because in the depths of his souls Tony knew they really needed to have that conversation. It was the only way Stephen could go over, admit his feelings for the man, ask for his forgiveness. That was the only thing he wanted, well aware that there wasn’t a single opportunity that Tony wouldn’t hate him at the end of that conversation. But he had to tell him the truth. That was the less Tony Stark deserved. 

Strange ran a hand in his hair and moved a step back, following with his eyes Tony moving around the living room and seating on a couch. Stephen decided that it was a good thing as everyone else to seat in front of the man and then he gathered enough courage to look at Stark’s face. The man, though, didn’t let him the possibility to say anything: “I saw Peter, today, he was speaking with Harley, they are worried,” He started, and Stephen hated himself because he didn’t notice. There where a lot of things he didn’t seem to notice, recently. “They care about you, and that’s why you can’t keep doing this.”

Stephen lowered his eyes to his joined hands, for once, the shaking was barely perceptible. “I can’t,” He admitted, and it was easy to do it with Tony. “I can’t because this is on me, I can’t because if I go back, then it means this never existed. I can’t, Tony.”

The man moved closer and was now kneeling in front of him, a callous hand against the scarred skin of Stephen’s ones. “Look at me,” He said, moving his other hand to Stephen’s chin so that the Sorcerer was looking into his eyes. “I’m sorry it had to be you, you don’t deserve it. We haven’t known for a long time, but I made some researches about you once I was back. You are a good man, and you didn’t deserve this crap.”

Stephen couldn’t tell if the ting he was feeling at the corner of his eyes were tears or the feeling that reality was crumbling against him, but he didn’t care at that moment. “But you can’t keep doing this. You will drain yourself, and you will die.”

“I deserve to,” Stephen said, and he didn’t even know if Tony heard him. “I killed you, I deserve to die.”

“No, you didn’t,” He knew it wasn’t the same feeling of flesh, he could feel the ghostly sensation when Tony’s hand reached for his chest, but believing they both were corporeal was easier. “I want you to live, ok? I’ll be there, always. Every time you want someone who can match your sassiness, I’ll be there, but I need you to stop doing this all the nights, okay?”

Stephen couldn’t help but nod, even if he knew that was a promise he couldn’t make. “Tony…”

“I’m here, I’m not going anywhere. And don’t you dare say you are sorry,” Tony’s smile was sincere, honest, and Stephen felt a warm wave in his chest before the ghost of the man he was in love with started to push at his astral projection. Stephen knew he would come back the night later, as he did for the past mouths, draining himself just because he wanted to see Tony, but, for the first night, he really believed in Tony’s words when he said him he was going to be there, for him. And, maybe, when he came back in his body he was crying, but he was more than sure that the last words he heard that night were: “I love you, too.”

**Author's Note:**

> I l(i)ove (for) kudos and comments!
> 
> find me on tumblr at ironstrange-is-the-endgame


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